Rituals...they bring me peace.

See this?  This is me.  At my happiest.

It's important for your to know that.  When was the last time that you saw yourself, with your own eyes, look visibly happy?  Did you see your soul radiate through your eyes?  If you haven't, you should.

These moments are fleeting.  Life brings many ups and downs, so we have to do our best to hold on to the happy moments when we have them, and carry them for strength when the storm hits.

 If you know me, you probably guessed it.  My daughter took this picture, right after Christmas Eve dinner this year.  My daughter makes me glow inside.  Making her happy and seeing her grow gives me light from within.

You must remember that I love her as much as any mother would love their child but that I've almost lost her 3 times.  I learned the hard way to treasure every moment.

When she was very ill, I would desperately long for "ordinary moments" with her.  The kind that you have throughout any mundane day, and not think twice about.  Turns out, those were the moments that meant the most to me when it came to sharing them with her and having her in my life. 

Such is also with any other of my loved ones.  I will take the a culmination of, or a collective of all the ordinary, everyday life moments with you, than birthdays, anniversaries or holidays.  Those mean the most to me, because it means that together we have shared life, and what a gift it is, in the most genuine form.


Today was a perfect example.  We got home from work later than usual, and exhausted.  I took a relaxing shower in effort to gear myself up to cook, and work in the kitchen to prep for my writing.  I got a call from my best friend who was bringing over lots of delicious food from our favorite Latin restaurant.   Perfect timing!  My son surprised us and came over for dinner too.  So, the 3 of us girls got to harass him and ask him endless questions about college, his girlfriend and theater rehearsals.  He secretly loves it when we interrogate him!  I know it.

We had a buffet-style dinner that was so great and hit the spot.  Meanwhile, I made Lisette a cake she likes that's called "Brazo De Gitana".  It's basically a roll [cake] with fruit filling, and then covered in powdered sugar.  I've made it before with raspberries but Lisette she likes it with guava, so I gave it a whirl.  It was delicious, but I only had pink powdered sugar, left over from my daughter's birthday party.  Everyone liked the cake, except I couldn't get over the fact that it was, well...pink!


During dinner, my daughter, with a very serious face asks me if I am a Buddhist.  She knows that I am not, so I was a bit confused.
"Then why do you have Buddhas throughout the house?"
"Ah.", I answer, "...because they remind me to bring myself peace".  They also remind me to smile.     


I just had this conversation with someone very important to me.  He was so excited about a home theater system that he'd bought.  I was truly happy for him  but I made the distinction for him about what I want to come home to.

For me it's not about those things as much as peace, and laughter.  A home that is filled with warmth, is a home that I want to come home to.  I'm simple in that sense.  I don't need expensive things, give me a candle that smells nice and I will absolutely love it.

Another thing that brings me peace and a smile to my face is having my own rituals.  They are never rituals that I impose on other people, but rather things that I do for myself.

For instance, I sleep with the curtains open, because I like to wake up to the sun shining in the morning, and to see the tree tops.  This immediately reminds me to close my eyes once more and give thanks to the Lord for all that we have been blessed with.  I even take a moment to thank Him for the painful things that I've been through that have made me stronger, more aware and have helped me to help others.  And lastly, I commit to myself not to take my blessings, or my lessons, for granted.  Then I wish the clouds and the tree tops a good day, and off to get ready for a new day I go.

 Another ritual is my 3 cups of strong black coffee in the morning, or how I can't eat breakfast at home but will always eat at my desk at work.  How I need to shower with lavender but use Jasmine lotion...  or how I need to be alone when I sit to talk with you, and give you my undivided attention.

When was the last time that you saw yourself visibly happy and at peace?  How do you bring that and keep it within your reach?

Well, tonight instead of a recipe to cook, I'll give you a recipe for harnessing happiness.  It's from one of my favorite poets.  Enjoy...

Joy and Sorrow chapter VIII

Then a woman said, "Speak to us of Joy and Sorrow." And he answered: Your joy is your sorrow unmasked. And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears. And how else can it be? The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain. Is not the cup that hold your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter's oven? And is not the lute that soothes your spirit, the very wood that was hollowed with knives? When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy. When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight. Some of you say, "Joy is greater than sorrow," and others say, "Nay, sorrow is the greater." But I say unto you, they are inseparable. Together they come, and when one sits alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed. Verily you are suspended like scales between your sorrow and your joy. Only when you are empty are you at standstill and balanced. When the treasure-keeper lifts you to weigh his gold and his silver, needs must your joy or your sorrow rise or fall. Khalil Gibran