Courage For An Unremarkable Day

A recent ordinary moment where I couldn't have possibly loved her more

As our days dance through the hourglass, I often find myself wondering where does time go.  Where are those ordinary yet elusive days that become hard to remember because nothing special happened on that particular day.

Days sometimes seem ordinary until tragedy strikes.  Or so it seems.  In my darkest moments I've longed for the ignorance and bliss of those unremarkable days.  Those days where we go on with our daily routines,  uninterrupted. 

Etched in my mind forever is the moment when I realized what really matters the most in my life.  Love. Love for my daughter, love for my family, people, my work, the world and God. 

It was during the time when my daughter was fighting for her life.  Her doctors weren't sure if she would make it through.  My family and I never gave up hope though.  We never let go of our faith. 
I was only comforted by the prayers of our friends and family resonating through the skies. I felt it in my heart.

I was alone in a room looking out of a large 7th story window in the Children's Hospital.  I thought back to an abyss of ordinary days that was my life before that moment.  I felt disconcerted and even ashamed of all of the trivial things that I had hoped for and stressed about. 

In that moment it became clear to me that all that I needed in my life was love. The love that I longed for most was that of my little daughter. I wanted to feel her little arms wrapped around my neck as I played with her and carried her. I longed to hear her giggling in the back seat of my car as we drove around in the car acting silly.  I daydreamed of all the future "ordinary" moments that I wanted to share with this little girl of mine.

Before then, I had looked at her in awe of how lovely and small she was.  I remember having thought how beautiful she was and wishing that she could stay that way forever.  Yet, in my moment of despair I longed for and prayed for nothing more than to see my child blossom into a lovely, healthy woman. 

I prayed that God would bless her with health, a life with meaning and old age to reflect on her own ordinary moments. My heart goes to Heaven in prayer that one day she is an elderly woman who can remember the lives that He allowed her to touch, and that she remembers a life filled with love.

Today, she's almost taller than I am and quite the young lady.  I can assure you that although sometimes I am nostalgic, I am never sorry to see her grow up and mature.  I'm well aware of how He has blessed her, and how hard she's fought to continue to become the woman that she will be one day.

That same epiphany of 12 years ago continues to teach me today.  Moments don't become remarkable only when tragedy happens.  They also become remarkable and blessed when miracles happen, and we allow faith to light our paths, even in our darkest hours.