Melo-Drama, Bollywood & Fish...

Scene:

I have my hair clipped up and sort of coming down at the sides.  My eyes feel heavy and tired.  The muscles in my neck and shoulders are so tight.  In the background, you hear an Indian soap opera playing on TV, because the truth is that I'm hooked on Bollywood.  

I have no idea what they're saying for the most part, yet I watch the soaps and own a DVD collection.

Like the Spanish soap operas that many of us Latinas have grown up with, they are full of drama, suspense, over-exaggerated facial expressions, unbelievable fashions, cleavage & lots of make-up.  At any given moment, someone may break out into song and dance.  Often, the themes center around love, hate, passion and forbidden love.  And all of those things, orbit around a secretly dysfunctional family dynamic.

Sound familiar to anyone?

Bole Chudiyaan (Hindi Video & Dance)

One of my favorites.  My daughter, my niece and I can sing every lyric (and have no idea what we're saying..)

Maybe, just maybe life seems like a little bit of a let-down, or disappointment at times when you grow up watching such intense story-lines and drama.  It took me a long time to find pleasure in life's ordinary moments rather than a flashy display of grandiose emotion.

Keep your expensive gifts, and dramatic displays.  Instead, hold my hand, push my hair away when it falls in my face.  Share the silence with me and let it resonate emotions that don't even need to be said.

Yes, it would seem that it took years to un-do all of the expectations that those Spanish Novelas weaved in my adolescent mind.  What makes love powerful is the gem that lays hidden in the bond between souls, not the display case. Sometimes that bond transcends time, and distance.  It's how loyal we choose to remain to that feeling, and how we choose to honor it.

On the up-side, I'm entranced by most things exotic and take so much pleasure in watching Bollywood movies or novelas.  The colors, the language, the dance..  You've probably guessed that my kitchen is subject to this same passion.  I enjoy taking something simple and giving it an exotic flair.

I want to romance your palate, and your senses.

Recently, I had my friends over for some much needed girl-time.  I decided to make what I call Caribbean Curry Fish on a bed of Jasmine rice and some fresh, hot Roti on the side.  The taste of the curry fish sauce and fresh veggies and herbs, tingled your lips and dance in your mouth.  So good!

Girl-time on the porch

Next time you're feeling adventurous, break out in song and dance like a Bollywood movie, and give this dish a try...

Caribbean Curry Fish (Sofrito-Style)

Swai Fillet washed in water and a little vinegar 

 On a large piece of aluminum foil, drizzle olive oil, a squeeze of lime and pepper, sprinkle garlic powder & a small amount of sea-salt.

Place the filet that sheet of aluminum foil, and drizzle olive oil, a squeeze of lime and pepper, sprinkle garlic powder & a small amount of sea-salt- this time on top of the fish.

  Surround filet with fresh spinach leaves

Lightly cover the filet with good quality curry powder to taste.  

I like a lot...

Add in fresh-grated ginger

  Add hot pepper or sauce (optional)

   Cover the filet entirely with red onion, multil-colored peppers, and mushrooms

   Top off with fire-roasted red peppers

.   Wrap & seal aluminum foil, cook in oven for about 35 minutes

   When ready, top off with a slice of fresh lemon and chopped cilantro , rosemary and basil.

Serve with a side of steaming jasmine rice and roti.

The Fever.

You have it.  I have it.  The fever.  Spring Fever.

It's that time of the year when the Earth breathes new life into everything she touches... including me.

You already know how much I enjoy cooking with natural, fresh ingredients.  Now, let's bring that into the bath...

I need to RELAX.  I feel like I've been through all sorts of roller coasters lately.  Exciting things, Ups then Downs. I've been overcome with thought & planning.  It's taken a toll on my muscles even.

If you asked me to go to a spa with you, I'd likely try and convince you to stay home and to give this a try instead.




I like to do these things at home, in my own environment with things that I've made with my own hands.

That's important to me because when I use ingredients or plants that I've prepared, it helps me to appreciate the journey that those ingredients took to get to me, and the hands they passed through.  Each set of hands had their own story behind them.

...Who planted these lemons?
...Who picked them?

It makes me wonder about those people, and what moves them.  What stirs their soul? Eventually all these random thoughts lead me to meditate and put that positive energy to good use. 

Next time you're too busy to go to the spa, are on a budget or just want to give this a try on your own...

Cut a whole lemon in slices, half of a cucumber and half of a kiwi.
Kiwi and Cucumber are terrific for your skin, and your eyes in particular.

I wet a towel and then microwave as hot as I can tolerate it...

It's important that you remain well-hydrated as the salts draw out the toxins.  Be sure to bring a nice, cold glass of water with you.

I like to place white candles all over the bath.
Add in your favorite playlist or CD.
Tonight, I was playing The Weeknd.  So perfect.

Make your own Detoxifying Bath

I bought a large jar, like the one in the photo and mixed

Epsom Salt

Lavender Scented Epsom

Eucalyptus/Camphor Salts

A small jar of ground ginger

1 jar of Sea Salt

These should all be mixed well inside the jar.

Mix in the warmest water that you can tolerate.  Throw in one cup full of the salts into the water.
These salts will not only serve as aromatherapy but they will also exfoliate and draw out toxins from your skin.

Add in a little of your favorite essential oils.
My favorites are Lavender, Jasmine or Grapefruit.

Add in fresh, fragrant herbs like Rosemary, Lavender, Mint...  Use and combine as you like.
I used all three from my herb garden.  It feels incredible to close your eyes and take those fresh, crisp aromas in.

Throw in the lemon slices.... this is so nice to rub on your skin as you're in the bath.

Ease yourself in and take nice, easy deep breaths.  Prepare to let everything go.
The salts, the ginger and lemon  promise to drain everything out of you slowly.

Place that hot towel over your shoulders and neck. Relax.  Breathe.  Smile, it's quite alright.
That's what you were meant for.  To FEEL.  To Feel Joy.  And to relish that feeling in peace.

Remember to give this a try next time you have a few moments alone, and need to get back in touch with yourself.  Spring's new energy is back.  Make sure that you save some of that for you...

Sweet dreams.

From the garden to your bath

 

That Constant Craving...

My version of Ceviche.. or Salpicon...

You know what I'm talking about.  I know you do.  That constant craving that overtakes your thoughts from time to time.  As a matter of fact, it never quite comes at the right time.  It can even be painfully distracting.  You want what you want.  Period.

I won't lie.  It happens to me.  All the time. 

Life, faith and maturity have a way of teaching you which cravings to give into, when and how.  There's even a way to make it fun.

See, I have rules.  I need rules.  I live by them.  I don't even really know how to break them... anymore.  I'm sure there was a time that I did.  My rules are simple to follow though.  Do onto others as you would want done unto you.

One of the things that drive me the craziest in this planet, is people who think "it" can't happen to them, or that the rules somehow don't apply to them.  What makes me apprehensive about this group, is that it often starts with something small like a white lie or omission of the truth.  Harmless, right?  No, not if you are on the receiving end.

I'm not passing judgment either.  At one time or another, I've been on either side of that spectrum.  I'm only saying that maturity and fairness have a way of helping us put ourselves in someone else's shoes.  The rules apply to us all.  There will never be a way to escape that.  We can find creative ways to delay the truth, but Justice is ever so persistent.

I've found a way to give into my cravings.  I always ask myself a basic question-  

"Could the outcome either hurt others, or hurt myself?"

Today, I craved DECADENCE.  I wanted something satisfying but hard to get.  I wanted to treat myself to something delicious.

So I had that conversation with myself.  "After all of the hard work that I've been doing, do I really want or need to be setting myself back?"  

Friends, this is an important question to pose to yourself from time to time- if you're willing to give yourself an honest answer.

I've learned that we all have feelings.  They are ours.  It's okay.  However, just because we have these feelings, doesn't mean that we have to act on them.  And even if it's okay to act on them, not always do we need to act on them now.

Time and discipline have a way of acting in our favor, often guiding us with clarity.  Easier said than done. Been there.  Done that.

To that point, I remind myself that everything I am presently doing to raise my 12 year old daughter will also have an impact on the 16 year old, 23 year old, 35 year old, 57, 65 & 88 year old of her future self.

I look at myself in that very same way.  The decisions that I make for the 37 year old me, today should also be for the benefit of the 40, 42, 57, 65 and 88 year old me.  The should continue to also benefit my loved ones, and loved ones in the future.   I willingly and gratefully shoulder that responsibility to myself and those in my life.

That's why it's crucial to have people in our lives who don't necessarily tell us what we want to hear, but commit themselves to our best interests and guide us toward our best future self. Yesterday, and today were very hectic and aggravating days for me.  Interesting because I don't typically get aggravated easily.  I have a longer fuse than most.  Although, when that fuse blows, duck behind something.  Just, duck.

I've been working out intensely, and religiously. My nutrition is en pointe as always, but using my upcoming vacation as a motivator, I've reduced my caloric intake.  I don't have a long way to go really, it's just that I don't feel like doing it... so that's even more reason to be like Nike... and just DO IT.

When I really feel unmotivated, I call one of my best friends, Brett.  He knows the way my mind works all too well, and can always find an uncanny way to motivate me.  Sure, I hang up the phone cursing him out under my breath, but you know what, I know that he is right.  And, I know that his concern is not just for the 37 year old me now, but for the 40 year old that plans to be in a bikini off the Andalucian coast of Spain.  That's a friend.

My dear friend, and nutrition guru, Brett.

He's also great about finding recipes that will keep me motivated.  Brett knows that I eat berries daily, I absolutely love them.  Back when we used to work together he would often surprise me with blueberries when he came back from lunch.  Me?  Like a kid in a candy store!

Recently we were talking about how chocolate is my downfall.  Later that week he emails me a picture of raspberries stuffed with dark chocolate chips.  Both the berries and the dark chocolate are good sources of anti-oxidants, that keep you healthy, vibrant and feeling great.  You can have 10-20 of these in one sitting and it's so much better for you than a candy bar.

My dessert today.  Raspberries stuffed with DARK chocolate chips.

All day today, and yesterday, I thought about a delicious salad that I had at a restaurant in TriBeCa, NYC.  The restaurant is Flor De Sol.  Excellent in so many ways.  I highly recommend it.
The salad that I had is called Salpicon.  It's seafood, purple onion, olives, peppers in olive oil and vinegar.  I enjoyed it immensely, but since I've kept thinking about how I would make it my own.

For 2 days I have been craving that salad, and the succulent, decadent chunks of crab and scallops tingling my mouth with lemon juice, vinegar and olive oil.  Since I didn't want to go to the gym today, I decided that if I did go, and gave it my all, that I would make this salad for dinner.  That was all the intensity that I needed.  My workout ended up feeling so good that I didn't want to stop and actually went longer.

After stopping at the market and getting fresh Alaskan crab, lobster, scallops, shrimp and clams I went home and put it all together with multi-colored peppers, purple onion, black olives, pepper, a crushed garlic clove, a pinch of salt, fresh-squeezed lime, vinegar and olive oil. I'm sure you have already figured out just how much I love avocado.  You guessed it.  I'm having it as a side to the salad. Divine.

One thing though... remember that I wanted something hard to get?  Rather than buying the lump crab meat ready-made I bought the crab fresh, cooked it and shelled it myself.  Nothing beats authenticity.  Nothing.

 

Eating healthy is a beautiful thing, as long as you respect serving sizes.  I took the rest of the washed seafood, marinade, peppers, olive oil, lime juice, garlic and sealed that in a mason jar.  The acid from the vinegar and lime juice will cook the seafood inside the jar.  You can leave that in the fridge, untouched, for a couple of days.  It's A-MAZING!

It was simple, natural and the time that it took to prepare, gave me time to unwind and set my mind back at ease.  How nice it was to sit with a glass of wine, and have this  healthy and decadent meal that was not only delicious, but it was something that I really, truly wanted- and earned.

That's my point.  It's great to treat ourselves to things that we want.  It's just on a greater level when it's something good for us, that we worked hard for and earned.  When the moment comes, it is a truly delicious moment.

Muy buen provecho!

Straight from my Mom's kitchen

Hey good-lookin'!  What'cha got cookin'?

So, I bet some of you are wondering if I've been cooking, and if so why haven't written about it lately.  I would wonder too.

The truth is that while I have still been cooking, and even some new dishes that you you'd enjoy, I haven't felt compelled to necessarily write about them yet.  Part of it is that I've had challenges with the photos.  I will only use my own photos here.  The lighting in my new kitchen is not the greatest for pictures, although dynamite for ambiance.

The core of the matter is that for many reasons, I haven't "felt" it.  A year ago or so I shared with you that cooking is an emotional experience for me.  Even something simple like a salad, is not really simple for me.  I can't help but to pour my feelings into my dishes.  It really does remind me of that book (and movie) Like Water For Chocolate.

Although it may sound poetic, it can also be a burden.  Some things, and some feelings are too profound and heavy.  Sometimes, rather than to experience them all over again, I rather just put those thoughts into a safe place until I'm ready to reconcile them.

Today, is a special day however.  Today, I'm sitting in my mother's kitchen in The Bronx, NY and watching her cook.  I'm actually sitting in the same chair in the far corner of the kitchen where I told you that Mamita would sit to watch my mom cook & chat with her.  This chair is a tradition.

My daughter, brother and Dad are spending time together in the other room.  My brother occasionally comes in the kitchen to make us laugh or crack a joke.  He is one of the funniest people that I have ever met, and can make my mother and I laugh until we're in tears.  He's also scoping the kitchen and being tortured by the smell of Mami's cooking, repeatedly asking, "Is it ready yet!".  My daughter also keeps doing the same while stopping to play with the magnets on her Nanny's fridge.

Again, my brother just came into the kitchen and just looks at me with that dry sarcastic glare.  I tell him that  I'm writing about him as we speak and he says, "Defamation.", as he walks away.  That's our dynamic, dry sarcasm.  It sometimes makes our mother crazy!

I have a long drive back home and my mom wants to make sure my daughter and I eat "una comida criolla" before we leave New York City.  Home-cooked meals are just her specialty.

This is the lady who taught me to cook with my heart.  As I watch her, I see so much of myself in her.  How much she cares, how deeply she feels her emotions.  How she communicates best with her gestures.

I miss these moments so much, and I treasure them with all my heart.  I couldn't let the moment pass, so I grabbed by iPad and here I am.  I want you to be part of this moment with me.

Today Mami is making Arroz con Costillas y Guandules!  A whole delicious meal made in a traditional rice pot, that used to belong to my grandmother, Mamita.  It's spare rib tips in yellow Criolle-style rice with peas.

Mami starts off with her hand-made sofrito.  She didn't have any pre-prepared, so she does it by hand.  Some people, like my friend Omar, prefer to do it that way.  It's a matter of preference, really. I enjoy both ways of making sofrito very much!  Actually, it's how it tastes and smells that I love... and all of the memories that it brings back.

I love watching my mom in the kitchen. She puts so much love in everything.

Mami cuts culantro leaves, mashes up fresh garlic in her pilon, cuts some white & purple onions, meticulously chops cubanelle peppers and the small delicious multi-colored ajis.  She also sneaks over some fresh-cut peppers and feeds them to me while I'm typing away.  Towards the end, she adds in fresh cilantro.

The trimmed and chopped spare rib tips have been marinating in apple cider vinegar and very little oil, with Sazon, Adobo, black pepper & garlic powder.  Mix well, cover tightly and let marinate overnight in the refrigerator.

In a large pot, already heated, Mami lets the meat cook down- only partially. Once you mix through, you will notice that in the water the ribs have rendered some fat.  Mom scoops this out as much as she can to reduce the amount of fat in the dish.

Then, she smothers the ribs with the homemade sofrito, mixes it through and adds in 2 cans of Goya guandules and one can of Goya tomato sauce.  Mix through again and add your rice and water.  Let that cook through as you would normally when you make rice.  The aroma will drive you crazy!

Serve with a side of garden salad dressed in olive oil and balsamic, and a slice of avocado on the side.  Healthy, delicious Puerto-Rican comfort food!

Muy buen provecho!  

I'm going to stay a while, and enjoy watching my Mami and have her delicious food.  
... I wish that you were here with me!

The Moment...

... The moment you reunite with your childhood dreams.

...The moment when you realize that so many people can't be wrong about something they said about you.

... when you realize you have a lot of work to do & you're up for the challenge.

...The moment when you decide to let go.

...The moment when you realize that what you weigh is your choice.

...  The moment when you realize that your "type" isn't really your type...

... the moment that you realize that love doesn't have to hurt.

... the moment when you thanked God for not doing what was easiest.

(...  the moment you thanked God)

... the moment you let yourself  DREAM.

...  The moment that you answer before he calls to you.

...  the moment that he hears you before you speak.

... the moment when you realize that you see her eyes even when yours are closed.

... the moment that his hand held yours for the first time.

.... the moment that took your breath away. 

... the moment when the truth stirs inside of you.

...  the moment where you decide to trust & obey.

... the moment when you find what you are looking for.

...The moment when it's 2:18 am and you can't sleep until you write this.

... This moment.

Energia.

...I don't care how much you think you know a person.

You can't possibly completely know a person because as human beings, we continue to evolve until our last breath.  

We don't ever know our own full potential.  And if you wake up and decide you've reached your full potential, then it's time to up your game.  Complacency is dangerous.

When it comes to the people in our lives, we hope that their own evolution will complement ours.  What happens if it doesn't?  Is that repairable?  Can you work through it?  I hope so.  I'm a believer that if there's a true partnership, it can be done.

That applies to family, friendships and intimate relationships.  How much do we want to invest?

I thought about that a lot today. I woke up early this morning, and decided to leave a nice roast slow-cooking with some full-bodied red wine, potatoes, carrots and salt & pepper.

Did you notice that I left out the Latin seasonings.  Today, I was all about simplicity.

In the meantime, I went to church, spent time with my friends afterwards, and then went to the gym.  I confirmed something I've known about myself today.  I like to be anonymous at the gym.  Even when approached with friendly conversation, I shy away from it there.  That's my quiet time to reflect...

By the time I got in, the roast smelled divine.  I threw some Jasmine rice in the rice cooker opened up a bottle of Malbec and let myself unwind in a hot shower.   I let the physical exhilaration of an intense workout set in and relax me.  What I had a hard time relaxing was my mind.  Strange, because my soul was definitely at peace.

The question becomes- where does all this energy go? 

Where is this evolution taking me?  Who I am today, is not the woman that I was five years, ten years ago.   I like this one so much better. 
I'm smiling so big right now as I write this... God only knows what's around the bend.  I'm game for what He has in store for me.  He has never let me down.  What I thought would break me, has made me a force.  So then, what's the worst that can happen?

Bring it.

The Myth Dispelled.

The same woman, to the 4th power.

Please allow me to un-confuse...  That's not a word.  I'm exercising my artistic freedom...

To know me is to have someone loyal, and faithful, in your corner.  I play by the rules, I love hard, but not easily.  I'm guarded by nature, and it makes sense why.  I know that I have a lot to give.  To the wrong people, that could potentially consume me.  So I leave it up time, and my discretion.

Now, not many people get that far.  Why?  Labels.  I suppose that it's human nature to try and fit things, and people, into a mold.  Don't bother.  I'll frustrate the life out of you.  I won't fit.

...Come to think of it, neither do you. You are more complex than you may be giving yourself credit for.  And even for those of you who pride yourselves on being "simple", I believe that the mere fact that you think so, proves your depth.

This is why I will confuse you.

I'm a God-loving woman.  I spend hours during the week, reading and contemplating scripture.  I put a lot of effort into sincere prayer.  I relish my quiet time with God.  I'm comfortable saying the "J" word anytime, anywhere.  Jesus.  That's right.  I'm typically in church 3 days a week.

That being said, I grew up with a Jewish step dad, and best friends with a Muslim family.  It's ingrained in me to love and respect others regardless of their beliefs.  In college, I decided to take an academic approach to it all and studied Islam, Christianity and Judaic studies in tandem.  I loved it!

Now, here's another layer.  I love dance.  Any and all kinds.  Growing up where I did, Hip Hop, Reggae, Bachata, Merengue, Salsa, Soca... African & Middle Eastern dance.  That's where my heart is. Percussion.  I dance for fun, and I've choreographed in the past as well.  I come alive when I dance.  Few things bring me as much joy as dancing does.

I was a deejay at a radio station for almost 4 years, and most people didn't know who it was, even people that knew me.  It's always so interesting to me when some people can't assimilate the part of me they know, with the person who I am.  All of her.

Peel another layer...  I am secretly a nerd.  I am passionate about science. As a teen I was in love with Chemistry & Physics.  My biology teacher kept my lab assignments as examples for future classes.  My fascination with science is that in my own mind, it helps me understand my faith.  To me, science proves what I believe about the universe.  It comes second nature to me... like dance does.

Oh, there's more.  Please don't let the red lipstick and hoop earrings confuse you...

My career is something that I am deeply dedicated to an enjoy. I can look back and see an undulating flow of success and failures that have built me up to become a well-respected authority in my field, and among my peers.


My point is... my request is... please don't try and put me in a pre-fabricated box, don't label me.  Don't define me.  It won't fit.  Do you know why?

I define myself as I go along in my journey.  I respect others.  I do onto others as I would want done to me.  While I may seek counsel, I won't seek approval.

The woman in church spending time with the Lord, the doting mother, the girl getting down to reggae on the dance floor, the executive, the academic, the writer, the passionate dreamer- they are ALL me.

And I love her that way.

When it hurts to walk away...

The fork in the road.

As we approach it (and we will several times in our lives) we are faced with choices that we lead us both toward opportunity and toward loss all at once.  If we go to the left, we lose the possibilities on the right.  And, vice versa.

How do we choose?  How do we face that fork in the road and know with certainty which road we are meant to walk?  We don't.

There is no certainty.  There is faith.

Yet weren't we graced with that voice inside of us that leads the way?  That voice is soft-spoken, but ever so persistent. Some of you reading this will call that voice Intuition.  Others will call it a Hunch, or Conscience.  Some of us answer to it as the Holy Spirit.  

The thing is that sometimes we don't really want to do what that voice is telling us is the right thing for us.  Right?  Have you ever been there?  I have.

Eventually things happen in our lives where by trial and error we see that we aren't quite in the place that we want to be and we start to think of the consequences of our every choice.  Some call it Karma, others call it Consequence, and some will call it Justice.

I've learned that not one of us is above the rules.  We have the will and the choice to break them but eventually what we do onto others will be done onto us as well.  Not to punish us, but to help learn and reinforce that He made us so that we could love each other, not so that we take away from each other.

So what happens when we've lived a certain way, alongside other individuals that we care about, but we come to that fork in the road and realize that is not the life that we want?  Sometimes caring for those people  means staying on a road that we know we don't belong in.  And, we know our path is elsewhere.

Does that mean you love them any less?  No.  It only means that in order for you to live your destiny you may have to walk along a parallel.  In my heart, I hope that one day our paths may merge again.  Until then, I have to follow the voice that is calling to me even if it means walking alone.

May you walk in faith, and walk the in the path that leads you to joy, to peace and to love one another.

...May we find each other in that journey.

It's okay to be sad.

The past year has been so powerful for me.  I learned that my inner voice is so powerful, yet I had to silence myself in order to make out her verses.

Some wonderful and delightful discoveries happened for me this year.  I look forward to sharing some of those with you in the coming months.  What I can earnestly tell you is that the brightest moments seemed to be borne of sadness.  Why is that?

I realized that if all had gone according to plan, I may have been too distracted to propel my spiritual and emotional growth, or my plans for the future.

Complacency.
 Jimmy Carter once said, "I hate to see complacency prevail in our lives when it's so directly contrary to the teaching of Christ.".

Those who know me best know that I have always been a very spiritual being, and my belief in God has always been strong.  I recently learned that it's not enough.   
(I can never force my views or my growth on any other individual, but I can share with you what I have personally learned and discovered.  You will choose your own path.)

Sadness made me fervently seek some answers.  Those answers brought me back on my own personal journey and relationship with God.  All my life I've tried to follow this narrow path, with a laundry list of rules.  I recently found that it's so much simpler for me than I had ever realized.  Love.One.Another.  

Loving your neighbor as you love yourself.  If we love others that way, wouldn't everything else just fall into place?  

What if we all did our part?  I find that as people we often commit to "doing our part" when things are okay.  Where humanity often falls short, is when things are tough.  Do we have the ability to commit when it's the hardest to do so?

Recently I've been assimilating my life experiences, my joys and my pains with what I'm learning in Bible studies.  Interesting.  This is what I found...  Answers.  

Before the last supper, Jesus dressed in a loin cloth washed the feet of the disciples. He set an example for us to follow.  If the Lord did that, then why can't I love and help my neighbors the same way? 

My pastor recently said something that made me think.  He said that when we find it most difficult to love another the way Jesus showed love for others, to look at that person with a new set of eyes.  Look at that person as your brother/sister, husband/wife, mother/father, friend, a person who needs your kindness and protection.  That really hit home for me.  Isn't that what we all want?  To be treated that way?

I have found a way not to reject my sorrows or despair, but rather to harness my sadness in such a way that it has brought me closer to the answers that I seek.  Who knew that they were written in a book some couple of thousands or years ago, waiting for me to receive them with an open heart?   Did you know?

Courage For An Unremarkable Day

A recent ordinary moment where I couldn't have possibly loved her more

As our days dance through the hourglass, I often find myself wondering where does time go.  Where are those ordinary yet elusive days that become hard to remember because nothing special happened on that particular day.

Days sometimes seem ordinary until tragedy strikes.  Or so it seems.  In my darkest moments I've longed for the ignorance and bliss of those unremarkable days.  Those days where we go on with our daily routines,  uninterrupted. 

Etched in my mind forever is the moment when I realized what really matters the most in my life.  Love. Love for my daughter, love for my family, people, my work, the world and God. 

It was during the time when my daughter was fighting for her life.  Her doctors weren't sure if she would make it through.  My family and I never gave up hope though.  We never let go of our faith. 
I was only comforted by the prayers of our friends and family resonating through the skies. I felt it in my heart.

I was alone in a room looking out of a large 7th story window in the Children's Hospital.  I thought back to an abyss of ordinary days that was my life before that moment.  I felt disconcerted and even ashamed of all of the trivial things that I had hoped for and stressed about. 

In that moment it became clear to me that all that I needed in my life was love. The love that I longed for most was that of my little daughter. I wanted to feel her little arms wrapped around my neck as I played with her and carried her. I longed to hear her giggling in the back seat of my car as we drove around in the car acting silly.  I daydreamed of all the future "ordinary" moments that I wanted to share with this little girl of mine.

Before then, I had looked at her in awe of how lovely and small she was.  I remember having thought how beautiful she was and wishing that she could stay that way forever.  Yet, in my moment of despair I longed for and prayed for nothing more than to see my child blossom into a lovely, healthy woman. 

I prayed that God would bless her with health, a life with meaning and old age to reflect on her own ordinary moments. My heart goes to Heaven in prayer that one day she is an elderly woman who can remember the lives that He allowed her to touch, and that she remembers a life filled with love.

Today, she's almost taller than I am and quite the young lady.  I can assure you that although sometimes I am nostalgic, I am never sorry to see her grow up and mature.  I'm well aware of how He has blessed her, and how hard she's fought to continue to become the woman that she will be one day.

That same epiphany of 12 years ago continues to teach me today.  Moments don't become remarkable only when tragedy happens.  They also become remarkable and blessed when miracles happen, and we allow faith to light our paths, even in our darkest hours. 

Where have I been, you ask?

The notion of "finding one's self" always seemed funny to me.  I always know where I am.
I'd often read about celebrities that went off to another continent to meet their destiny and find God.

For me, and thankfully for my budget, I didn't have to leave the comfort of my home.  I've always felt that God lives within us.  I can always find Him when I look for him.

I just needed to be quiet for a while so that I could actually hear Him.  That's right friends. All this time, all this sorrow, and all this frustration and in the end, all I had to do was to be...quiet.

Silence can be so loud.

Today, I'm happier and more fulfilled than I have been.  I had to let go of things, of people and of the past to get here.  It has been worth it, and I look forward to sharing that with you soon.

I've missed you.

Are you a Magnet, or a Sponge?

The answer is both.

Our souls appear to be magnetic.  We become what we surround ourselves with, and who we embrace in our inner circle.  Have you ever noticed that repetition and exposure breeds behavior?

Much like when we are around someone who has a charming Southern Drawl and we start to inadvertently pick up that sweet twang? As people, we are generally influenced by what we surround ourselves with.

I tend to keep people close to me who are positive, hard-working, compassionate...and funny!  By nature, I'm no comedian, and can't tell a joke to save my life.  So, I try to learn to take a lighter approach on life, and laugh at myself when I need to from my friends who have a humorous edge.

I recently read something about people who had serious illnesses achieving much better progress and healing by watching a funny movie every day.  It sounds cliche, that laughter is the best medicine, but the fact is that human beings seek joy in everything that we do.  When we laugh we are experiencing joy, and are in a state of fulfillment.  So to my funny friends, you know who you are, I love you for helping to keep me healthy.

Your body is not so much a magnet, as it is a sponge.  When you eat or drink, your body is going through the process of Absorption of what is contained in whatever you ingest.

The definition of Absorption is literally:

uptake of substances by a tissue, as of nutrients through the wall of the intestine

By no means am I a nutritionist, or anything closely related to that.  What I am, is just like you!  A person made of organic materials and cells that are relying on my choices throughout the day for the nutrients that I need.  

Keep in mind that absorption doesn't just involve food.  When a person smokes, or uses drugs the body has to ingest this too.  The body is then absorbing materials that it doesn't need and that are in fact harmful.  

Although a person may not be considering this when they are smoking, or eating unhealthy foods, the human body does not discriminate.  It MUST do something with what we give it.  It must ingest it and process it.

I've always had a healthy respect for nutrition for two reasons.  First because I grew up in a household where we cooked fresh food with fruits and vegetables.  The second was a result of having attended a high school that specialized in Math & Science. 

Biology, Physics and especially Chemistry, opened my eyes to the magic behind food.  I was able to see how the body processes the food we eat, and how it's used after we ingest it.

This made me conscious eating was more for staying healthy, alive and vibrant than it was for the pleasure of tasting the food.  Taste is just an added bonus.

Although growing up in my home we ate very fresh and nutritious foods we had 2 very serious problems that I was not aware of until I was an adult.  The first was portion-control.  

You would be shocked to know how much less food our bodies require in comparison to how we feed.  For instance, I read once that a pregnant woman really only requires an extra glass of whole milk a day to compensate and feed her growing baby.  This means the cravings for everything extra is not really because she's "eating for two", but rather hormonal and should be watched closely.

Recommended daily caloric intake for women is often said to be 2,000 per day and for men 2,500.  Calories are what the body transforms into energy.  It's fuel.  If we consume more energy than we need, the body has no other alternative than to turn it into fat for storage.  

If you look at a recent picture of yourself and find that you have more fuel "stored" than you did last year then science says that you either have to cut back on caloric intake or increase your exercise so that the furnace inside of you can metabolize and burn that stored fat. 

The second problem with the diet in my household was diversity of nutrients.  Although we ate fresh and healthful foods- we always ate the same kinds.   I only realized this problem very recently.

This past January, I had my annual physical.  I can't stress enough how important annual check-ups are.  Reality is that we get busy and fall into routines.  However, remember that our bodies do not discriminate.  Just because we're not thinking about it doesn't meant that there aren't issues to be attended to inside of us.  Those issues can me emotional, psychological or physiological.  All need to be attended to.  To feel completely healthful we strive for harmony in all aspects of our being.  

Let the professionals tend to the parts of you that you aren't equipped to.  The best way to do this is to schedule your annual physicals and exams.  

By doing so every year, it gives you the time, and chances to fix any fluctuations or concerns.  My results did not come back so good this year.  I was told that my blood and Vitamin D counts were severely low.  The risks of this could likely become breast or bone cancer. 

I have always believed that we should focus on what we can control and leave the rest in God's hands.  What I was able to control was my faith, a positive outlook, my nutrition and exercise.

In a recent article, I let you know that my daughter talked me into buying the Ninja Food Processor.  It's a very high-powered processor/blender.  I didn't want that money to go to waste and I thought it would be a good idea to put it to use.  

My friend Brett is a nutrition guru.  That's who I often talk to when I need encouragement on how to eat and exercise better.  Having a friend or some time of moral support to brighten your outlook is key!  If you need one, I can be yours.  

I also reached out to my aunt Liza.  We cannot ignore family history and genetics either.  We have to try and incorporate history into our outlook for the future, right?  My paternal grandmother died of bone cancer at a very young age.  My aunt Liza went through all of this with her, and since had become very knowledgeable on nutrition as well.

I took all their information and encouragement and gave it all a lot of thought.  First, I decided that I was going to be healthy and make permanent life changes.  Not only for me, but to serve as an example for my daughter and the people I love.  I don't force my eating habits on them, but they are welcome to join, or try new things.  If one or two positive changes happen for them as a result, then this is what I hoped for. 

I started to research the foods that they recommended and learned even more.  I'm a person that will stick to something if I can understand how it really works. Try this website.  In simplest terms it explains so much.  I have it book-marked because I reference it all the time.  You can easily and quickly look up fruits, veggies, spices, nuts and oil for nutritional content and uses.  It also inspired to try new things!

http://www.nutrition-and-you.com/index.html

In the next few articles, I'll share with you some of my favorite and fun ways to ensure that I have balanced, healthy nutrition that's fast and easy to make.  

Remember, you are a magnet- so choose to only attract the very best around you.

Also remember that you are a sponge... choose to absorb only the best inside of you.